"Mommy?" I heard a sweet little voice in the back seat.
"Yes, darling?" I replied, as I spun around in my crinolined skirt, tied my apron in place, and patted my perfectly coiffed hair. A mean feat considering I was also driving.
"What are these round squishy things?" he inquired.
Naively, I requested clarification. "What round squishy things, honey?" Still channeling June Cleaver.
"The ones beside my penis," he explained.
Oh. Those round squishy things. I didn't turn around to see whether or not they were on display. Anything is possible. And yes he used the anatomically correct term. I have to say he didn't learn it from me; I prefer to be more euphemistic.
"Yeah, Mommy, what are they?" Rainbow added. Inquiring minds want to know.
A long period of silence ensued, during which time I ever-so-imperceptibly turned the radio up in an effort to distract them. Bet June never got this question. If she did, she probably said, "Go ask your father." Which sounded like a pretty good option. However, one that I feel is unavailable to me as a 21st century mom.
My children waited expectantly.
"Ahhhh, those contain a chemical called testosterone which is what makes you a boy," I offered lamely. Then braced myself for a barrage of follow-up questions.
"Cool!" exclaimed Taz. "This song is on our Kidz Bop CD!"
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4 comments:
That is HILARIOUS! Thanks for the peek into my future!! Too funny. Will- at the tender age of 2- is already inthrawled with his "pee-pee". Ugh- men.
D that was freakin' hysterical! Thanks for making me laugh!
can't. stop. laughing.
thank you for the chuckle. i desperately needed it today. the wonders of kids minds are always entertaining. and what a story for his first girlfriend! (btw - great answer.)
Out of the mouthes of babes - this one could end up circulating the internet!
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